Wednesday, 31 March 2010

March review....

So as its the last day of March I though I would look back at the month a little bit.

March has been, mostly, a month of stress. My degree is finishing and that entails a whole bucket of stress that I hadn’t suspected was round the corner. I don’t know why I wasn’t expecting it. You think that I could of worked out that finishing major part of my life for the last three years would come with a little bit of stress, but rather I had just assumed I would be okay. And heres the kicker, I have no reason to be stressed. I have a job, a house and it isn’t a problem if I don’t get a ‘proper’ full time job straight away. Yet this has me stressed to an unreal degree! (No pun intended!)

The flat which J and I are buying, although sorted legally, the build, a thus moving date, keeps on being pushed back. This in itself this is nothing to be worried about, but it does mean that our moving in date now coincides with the week of my final exam. This can be sorted, yet I am still worried. This make no sense. I have no need to be worried, yet still my chocolate intake has increased exponentially as the month has progressed!

My dissertation has also been the harbinger of much stress in my world. It is nearly finished- I literally have about 1000 words left to write. Yet still, it worries at me. I worry that it isn’t good enough, that I haven’t written the right thing, that i’ve missed the point, that my supervisor is going to yell. Stupid worries. Worries that won’t come true. My supervisor would yell in a million years, some one would have told me at some point in the last year if it wasn’t right, if I was missing the point.

So I think that I will categorize March as the month of many little stress. So much so that I have earned the nickname of ‘Angry Lindy’, not an epithet that I want on my grave stone! So here is my pledge. In April I will make a concerted effort to be calmer. To not make every tiny thing a big issue, to not make mountains out of mole hills so to speak. Regardless of my exam, and my dissertation deadline and the impending move I am going to try so hard not to get het up. To be calm. To be happier even.

(I also think i like this review thing, and will try to do one every month.)

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